The #1 Way to Cure Social Anxiety and Get Over Bullying

hi this is tom with in the last video we took a look at curing social anxiety by examining early childhood trauma through the lens of the wisdom and insight that we possess today this video does much the same thing but we’re looking at junior high school and this story is a personal story and it has a tragic ending but it will help us examine our current levels of social anxiety and how we can help cure them Junior high school it’s a very awkward time in everybody’s life where we’re going through a lot of changes and it’s really probably our most vulnerable time socially and if you have social anxiety a lot of that stems from typically junior high school memories so my situation was I was in junior high school I was in sixth grade and I had a bully that lived on the Block next door to me and he was in eighth grade and every time I walked by this kid’s house I remember he had this big eucalyptus tree in his front yard I can still smell the smell of eucalyptus every time I think about this story but every time I would walk by this kid’s house he would viciously attack me sometimes physically but usually verbally he would attack me in ways that really devastating to a young boy so every time I walked by and he would yell at me and just really in a vicious way and I was so humiliated and so ashamed and every time he would attack me I would have this feeling that I wasn’t good enough that I wasn’t enough and I would think what is it about me that is causing him to see something that he wanted to attack so badly whenever somebody is trying to intentionally hurt you it’s because they are trying to soothe something within themselves to make themselves feel better to somehow heal themselves in a very ineffective way but where the story really becomes tragic is that when this kid was in high school he took his dad’s gun and he shot himself committed suicide which is just horrible for the family for his sister it’s a very sad story but it really underlines what I’m trying to say it was not about me it was about the rage that he had within himself that whatever it was that he had going on I don’t know but it wasn’t about me if it wouldn’t have been me it would have been some other kid that he would have bullied because it was something inside of him that caused him to lash out at people in this way we are in a situation currently where you’re feeling vulnerable certainly these kind of past memories come up as a potential right a potential outcome of what could happen and that’s not an outcome that I’m willing to have happen in any situation so it really is a cause of social anxiety because the downside of kind of failing in a social situation can be so stark but that’s not really the reality so examining these past traumas can really help us bring our full attention to the current moment rather than our own insecurities and being carried away with our emotions if we can look at it and think to ourselves what is going on with this person what is causing this how can I maneuver to either get away from this person or to handle them in a different way that’s going to have a better outcome allows us to bring a hundred percent of our attention to the given moment so rather than being carried away with emotion or fear and bring our full amount of wisdom our full amount of insight into the situation that we’re currently in rather than have and past fears or being carried away by emotion allows us to bring our full potential and be our best in any situation so let’s take a look at some of those past traumas that you may have experienced and just see them for what they were so that the next time you’re feeling that social anxiety you can get to the root of it and not just address the symptoms of this of the anxiety and so we’ll continue this in our next video please subscribe once again I asked you to do that so I continue to make these videos thanks so much have a great day bye