Gay Men Answer Sex Questions You’re Too Afraid To Ask


– My parents are gonna flip. (intense music) (typewriter keys clicking) – I’m a little nervous right now. – Oh, boy, you guys are
crazy, this is gonna be fun. – This is a very important question. – Does size matter? I’ve never been intimate with
a guy and got to the point where I was like, oh my
gosh, you’re too big, or oh my gosh, you’re too small. I mean, it’s, you are
who you are, and I think you gotta end up like,
you know, figuring it out. Just have fun. – For me, size doesn’t matter,
that won’t be everyone. I don’t know, I think it’s
more about the intimacy that you share with someone. – How do you figure out
who’s topping or bottoming, and do you ask beforehand? I do ask beforehand, but I
do it in a very unusual way. I ask people if they prefer
to be big or little spoon. – I don’t ask beforehand. Oftentimes, I’m like super
surprised at what happens in the bedroom, and what people like. – Does it hurt to bottom? – It can hurt if the person is too big, if there’s not enough lube use. – People also say it’s the
responsibility of the top to prepare the bottom, so that it doesn’t hurt as
much, get them more relaxed. – It may hurt for the
first two or three minutes, but after that, it’s pretty okay. – How do you prepare
yourself if you’re bottoming? You have to take your body
signals into consideration. Like if you just had a lot of greasy food. – I stick with things that
are going to kind of help you relieve yourself, fruits,
vegetables, soups. You can feel if your
stomach is like backed up. You’ll kind of know whether
or not it’s going to be a good situation or not. – There are gonna be times
when you have sex with somebody and you get (bleep) in your (bleep). And it is okay, it’s a natural process. It might freak you out,
do not make them feel bad. – Is there a technique
to topping for anal sex? Don’t just like plunge
yourself into someone, like that’s a no-no, that’s
gonna be a huge turnoff. And taking your time, making
sure that they’re wherever you are, you’re wherever you are. – A guy has a prostate,
which a prostate is like your little fun area in your butt. And if you hit that prostate
correctly, then the bottom can have the most amazing orgasm ever. Because I will say that
the best sex is when the other person is being
pleased to their liking. ‘Cause when you know that
they’re being pleased, you can be pleased, as well. – Do you ever compromise and top or bottom when you don’t normally? It’s not a really big problem
because I like to do both. – Initially, when I first came
out, I was really dead set on being a top, and I think
one of my biggest hangups was just kind of gender
roles and masculinity. Does being versatile or being on bottom, does that encroach on my masculinity? Ultimately, no. – How often do you get tested
if you’re sexually active? I get tested every couple
months, because some STIs don’t show up on tests right away. There can be weeks or
sometimes even months in between the time a person gets infected and when they will show
a positive on a test. There’s lots of STIs that sometimes, you don’t even have any symptoms. – I get tested every three months. I am on PrEP, or I’m on Truvada, so it is an HIV preventative drug. And one of the big things
about that is that, even when you’re on it, you are required to get your blood tested and
everything every three months. That is a really, really great
way of me knowing my status, knowing how I am. – How do you know if the
other guy has been tested, and how would you go about asking him? If you don’t know if a
person has been tested and they’ve not told you, then ask. And be willing then to
also share your experiences with being tested. – I will say, no matter what,
even if you ask somebody, you’re not positive about their answer. I mean, just be cautious and think, anytime you go into a sexual situation, somebody could have anything,
unless you see the paperwork, and unless you see the proof,
you’re really not gonna know. – What’s the most
important thing about sex? To be really connected with
someone else, and to have that energy and that passion. I think that’s the most
important thing with sex. – Something that’s important about sex is consent and communication. By consent, I mean, whether
or not you truly wanna go through the act of having sex, and what kind of sex you
wanna have with someone. Or if they wanna have sex with you, and what sort of sex that they wanna have. – Read people’s body language a lot. People aren’t always verbal about things. They may be a little cautious,
they may be a little wary, but just take in mind
other people’s actions. – Your gay sex is your gay sex, and it’s beautiful. There’s a space for you
regardless of what you like or what you don’t like. Just have fun, enjoy. (bright music)